dirty little bastard

That dirty little bastard called anxiety is back invading my space. So I have picked up lots of books to read to help me empower myself to be my own best defense against it. To know that the fear is something I can conquer. It is my little girl that is petrified of being abandoned and too afraid to exert her power. So I am going to write some letters to my little Wendy and tell her that I am here to take care of her and everything will be alright. I can do this. I also intend to cut back on many of my obligations at this point. I cannot carry the load I am carrying and need to honor my body's need for more rest, exercise (in the form of walking) and reconnection with my girlfriends. I need to alter the shape of how my life is going. I need to bring joy back into my life. In opening back up to my circle of friends, I allow them in to help me see that things will be alright. Absolutely. 
Anxiety for me is a time related issue. It can escalate into sheer panic. Or it can simply take time to dissipate. I think in this case, if I continue to speak my truth as it arises, I will be able to allow it to present it's challenge, move with it as it moves in me, listen to what it is trying to tell me and then hopefully bid it farewell.
I cannot allow the fear to strip me of the power I feel when I am well. I deserve to be happy and whole. I am long since past the trauma of my childhood and I need to recognize that no one can do these things to me again unless I allow them. The fear comes straight from my childhood place of abandonment. When I am able to set this free, my life in all other areas will become fuller. More rational. And sane.
So on with the journey.
I am going to start with a letter to little ole' me.